Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Catstacular Event - Guest Post from SPARKLE

Today I have another exciting guest post for you.
From a beeootiful lady cat.
I wonder if she will have time for a little post post chat.

Ah-hem. The publicist told me I need to behave. So please welcome Sparkle with some great advice for the humans in your life.

I think I'm in LOVE

Humans! What Is Your Cat Telling You?
By Sparkle

We cats are great communicators. We can convey our needs and desires without resorting to words - or even meows! Unfortunately, humans are terrible listeners. When we are trying to tell them something, all too often, humans tell us we are being "bad." I am beginning to think that there needs to be a cat-human dictionary, but since there isn't one yet, I will toss out a few translations here. I've picked some of the most misunderstood kitty communiques for this post. I hope it helps.

Human Misunderstanding #1: Why does my cat keep scratching the side of the couch? Is she releasing her frustration - she does it with such intensity!
What Your Cat Wants: I know my fellow kitties are saying "duh" to what I am about to say, but... hello! Your cat wants a cat tree! One that has a really scratchable surface! Not one of those flimsy, cheap scratchers. Something she can dig her claws into, something that won't wobble or fall over when she stretches up to scratch. If you want your cat to stop scratching the couch, you should make sure the cat tree's surfaces are more appealing to scratch than the couch fabric. As to why your cat is scratching with such intensity, it's kind of like an English-speaking person raising their voice when they are talking to someone who doesn't speak English. For some reason, they think they may be understood if they talk louder. Of course, that does not work for human language, and kitties, keep in mind that it does not work for cat language, either.

Human Misunderstanding #2: Why is my cat clawing the rug, even after I've told him no? And yes, he does have a cat tree!
What Your Cat Wants: While this is similar to Misunderstanding #1, it requires a slightly different solution (right, kitties?). Your cat wants one of those scratch loungers that are so popular these days. You know, the ones made of corrugated cardboard and shaped like a cat bed. You see, sometimes we cats like to scratch vertically, and sometimes we like to do it horizontally. A scratch lounger works for those times we need to scratch horizontally. If that does not satisfy your cat, then maybe you need a horizontal scratcher made from a different type of material, like maybe... carpet!

Human Misunderstanding #3: My cat keeps chewing on my plants! And it seems like the more I shoo her away, the more she does it!
What Your Cat Wants: Your cat likes chomping on greens, and she is probably bored too. Using your plants as cat grass is killing two birds with one swipe, so to speak. She gets her greens and some excitement at the same time. But what is really going on is that she is telling you to dump your silly plants and buy some real cat grass and catnip plants instead. And throw some interactive toys into the bargain, so she will stop being so bored.

Human Misunderstanding #4: Why does my cat keep jumping on shelves and knocking things off? He even looks at me when he is doing it. Is he trying to spite me?
What Your Cat Wants: Obviously, he is telling you that the shelves are his territory and your dumb knickknacks are getting in his way! (Another "duh," moment, isn't it, fellow felines?) There are actually nice-looking cat shelves and catwalks you can invest in and hang on your walls. Maybe you should get some of those. What if your cat shuns them after you have put them up? Maybe you should put your knickknacks on them and lay down some carpeting on the shelves your cat was jumping on to begin with! The original shelves probably have a better window view of Bird TV, or of the kitchen.

See? Cat language is totally easy to understand!

Now if only the humans will take this advice. Sparkle is a famous author! You can buy her books on her blog, Sparkle, the award winning author, supermodel and Cat. They are called
Dear Sparkle: Advice from one Cat to Another  and Dear Sparkle: Cat to Cat Advice. You can also buy them on Amazon.

Sparkle does a lot of work on behalf of shelter cats and I, for one thank her for that.

Be sure to head over to the publicist's blog today where Pricilla is making a visit in spite of her vacation to give away three bars of her Cat's Got Your Goat soap.


  1. See, now this is where I find Gypsy Coin Torture to come in handy.

    Find plastic can.....fill with gypsy coins.....(pennies will do in a pinch).....and shake as needed.

    Guaranteed success.

    Everybodys do zee gypsy dance of joy!


  2. lol I love the what the misunderstandings!

  3. Great guest post Sparkle. We agree with all you answers. If those things called humans would just listen to us cats. We try to tell them what we need.

  4. My cats have everything... and their claws still like my rug better than theirs... wonder if it has something to do with the fact that mine is/was a lovely wool rug and there's was/is remnants that were intercepted on the way to the garbage.......

  5. The big orange cat here, Snickers, says that those translations are so correct. He also thinks Sparkle is purrfectly lovely!

  6. I gotta also agree that mine ignore all those niceties and love the rug and the sofa. I think some habits are just too hard to break:)

  7. Great guest post by Sparkle! It took our mommy 5 years to figure out we wanted a cat tree and we finally got one last week. Beans are really, really slow sometimes but persistance pays off.

  8. Way to go, Sparkle! I hope all the humans out there read this!

  9. We agree, Sparkle. You have some very good tips. We think you are a very beautiful cat.!

  10. Oh my Sparkle is stunning isn't she!

  11. Thanks, Sherpa and Pricilla, for giving me the chance to guest post on your blog!

  12. yes there is one chair in the house that seems to belong to cats. It almost seems like a greeting or anticipation of some kind because they get a few claws in it only on the way to get fed!

  13. You said it Sparkle! If they'd just plant me some more catnip...
    They keep saying I kill it chewing it and rolling on it (but that's just love).
    If they loved me, they'd plant more, every day if necessary!


Maaaaaa away....


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